Dear Beloved Souls:

My story begins with growing up in Denmark - I remember being at first happier than ever, harmoniously balanced and in touch with my authentic soul self. However, a very traumatic time for me kicked in when my sister was born - she was dealing with major health issues and learning difficulties. Being raised with regular violent interventions and major conflicts between my parents, the hospital and police emergencies revolving my sister taught me to be vigilant during emergencies. Family conflicts on my mother's side also created much intensity and fearfulness. Despite all this, I remained strong and felt happy overall. Right until the age of 10, a classmate of mine catalyzed my intensely conditioned fear-mind to start thinking inwardly around the same time as my other self was born in Canada. Over a short period of time, I went from feeling like the embodiment of sunshine, joy and love being a highly socially interacting and friend-oriented initiator into becoming a quite introverted, over-thinking emotional teenager who felt out of touch with physical and mental maturity, but very ahead intellectually, creatively, emotionally and expressively. My whole life went from resembling a high level of overall happiness to a darker Moon-like territory - a mere distant reflection of that same early-life brightness. We moved - my neighbourhood changed from extroverted, modern and close by to far away, isolated and old-fashioned. My regular vocal-lead keyboard performances at the local music school turned into technical classical piano taught in a distant cold and dark room in an ancient school building... I became in a way, soul-depressed, and it stayed with me for years, until I went to high school.

At the local high school, I finally found a way to get back in touch with some of the spotlight and creative expression I craved, which was second nature during my pre-teenage years. MUSIC was my outlet, but also my escape. During my pre-teenage years, talking and socializing with my female friends was the most normal thing ever. I didn't understand my friends and class-mates were now pursuing dating etc. I didn't get the vibe, why was this such an important thing? Well, the lack of ability I felt towards pursuing dating at the time, was for me compensated through dominating and leading all musical and sound related circumstances on that high school. Naturally, I got plenty of attention through my performances etc., which became an easy way for me to impress everybody. So I started living, breathing and expressing myself entirely through music. But what about my soul? My sunshine self. Well, there were lots of light on stage, so I was OK, I thought...

This mindset actually continued for years. What I didn't know at the time was that the answer to resolving this instability was actually in Canada...

which came as a surprise after I had well endured many early childhood conflicts, emotional wounds and traumas of violent episodes and family emergencies. I isolated myself more and started feeling disconnected from the world and society as a whole as I started seeing through the veil of illusions. I also felt ashamed of my own shadow sides that were quite imaginative - to say the least. Luckily, earlier in my life I had found music, which became a way to express my light and a way to escape the darkness of my mind. It provided the confidence I needed throughout my teenage years, and an emotional gateway back to the happy part of my childhood, my true self and soul. I was conditioned by my surroundings to believe that becoming a professional musician was an unrealistic goal, but instead of subscribing to this belief, I eventually told people: "I'm going to North America to become a professional musician".

And so I did, landing and relocating to Vancouver in 2007/08 and everything that I had envisioned started manifesting from the very first day. Being a musician isn't always the easiest way of life, but provided me with the opportunity to meet people and get into situations that catalyzed multiple spiritual awakenings. The break from the world during Covid helped solidify my professional skills of doing astrology readings and spiritual guidance, and I was granted to meet my Monadic Soul counterpart in September, 2021. With my deeply intuitive, big thinking analytical mind, adapting to a new life approach based around soul consciousness was a difficult transition as I had many subconscious wounds to transmute. I underwent several more ego deaths, and overcame doubt, changes in belief systems, major health issues and work life/career changes. Later in 2025, I reached a stable inner union with myself, and felt truly ready to pursue my soul mission (LAESoul) whole-heartedly. On a more mundane level, I am grateful to be a successful musician performing in Vancouver, BC and other North American cities. I also teach, produce and compose music and run my own business. Yearly, I visit my family in Denmark for a month where I hang out, compose new music and write articles for you all! :-)

Philip

WITHIN

My Journey